Ep. 82 This is Why Adversity is a Gift: Lessons from John Maxwell

Facing life's inevitable struggles is not just about survival but about choosing growth and transformation. Inspired by John Maxwell's philosophy, we explore how to turn challenges into stepping stones for personal development.

I'll share how an unexpected heart scare in 2023 became a catalyst for transformative lifestyle changes. Despite a disciplined approach to health, the incident reminded me of life's unpredictability and the importance of continuous personal growth. Drawing from Charles Killering's insights on the value of setbacks, we'll discuss how adversity can spark creativity and propel us toward positive change. Join me on this journey to embrace change, nurture a positive mindset, and harness the potential of life's adversities.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Learning and Growth Through Struggles
• 16:12 Embracing Change After Health Scare

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Well, hello. Words for Change podcast. It's Lionel man. It's so excited to have you here on this Tuesday morning. It's October 29th and, boy, do we have an episode for you today. We're going to talk about it, but I want to first say, once again, thank you for your continued support of the Words for Change podcast. Man, god has allowed us to do so much and we're looking forward to do so many more things as we move toward the end of the year, into 2025. And today, boy, we're going to cover a wonderful topic that I believe is going to help you. So I'll start off by asking you this question Are you learning from the problems you're experiencing?

Speaker 1: 0:36

John Maxwell said this we will all experience problems. Problems are inevitable, but growth is optional. Do you believe that problems are inevitable but growth is optional? Do you believe that problems are inevitable but growth is optional? But I have a question for you today. What day is it y'all? Yes, here, on October 29th, right before Halloween. Good morning, vietnam.

Speaker 1: 1:03

Well, if you didn't know it, our famous, one of the famous theologians, hustok Gaterez, who began the liberationist theological conversation many, many years ago, died at the age of 96. He came up with the slogan the preferential options for the poor, god's preferential options for the poor, god's preferential options for the poor. So Hustogutrez was a Catholic theologian who argued for that perspective to the gospel of Jesus Christ, particularly the working out of theology. Hustogutrez was also a Peruvian priest who I had the privilege of reading and studying him in graduate school, and so his contributions are have been made, and God rest him and his soul during this time.

Speaker 1: 1:54

What a wonderful movie that's coming on. I don't know if you guys have heard about it, matter of fact, it's already out in theaters. Called Conclave, it talks about the papacy power and takes it very, very seriously. So the political theater was studied tremendously and the Conclave is directed by Edward Burgers, based on a novel written by Robert Harris. Ok, so you guys have got to check this out. It talks about the power in the Catholic Church, and I don't I'm not making any statement for or against, I just think it is a wonderful movie that you guys can check out. Matter of fact, me and my wife are going to spend time watching as well. I love those movies like that.

Speaker 1: 2:40

Church is history and how we come up with the things in our current Christian faith and religion, in the United States in particular, where they derive, from how they impact us, from history itself. You guys should check that out. Also, you guys know that it is voting season, so make sure you exercise your right to vote. It is the obligation to our American society and man. I'm always excited about voting and talking to my daughters, my family, my son, about voting and its important contribution, how we participate in our democratic idea in society. I'm not telling you who to vote for, but I'll tell you one thing we will always keep God first. As I've always said, god doesn't ride on the backs of what elephants or donkeys and so I want you to. I don't care where you are, have friends all over the map, just please make sure you exercise your right to vote and always keep your Christian identity when you walk into that voting booth. Y'all Speaking of staying focused, you know one of the very, very important mental health issues we're having today is people being diagnosed with ADHD, and some research says that ADHD is causing a large percentage of children, as well as adults, with new diagnoses.

Speaker 1: 4:09

Children 10.5% of children, or 6.1 million, have currently have been diagnosed with ADHD. 6% of adults, that's about 15.5 million, have been diagnosed and some of the symptoms that come along with children and adults is absolutely staggering. The median age of diagnosis for mild ADHD is seven years old. For boys, it's higher, somewhere between 15 and 8%. African-americans or blacks, whites and Native American children are more likely to be diagnosed with ADHD. Non-hispanic children are more likely to be diagnosed as well. Adults with ADHD are more likely to be under 50 years of age, and those in lower household incomes are also more likely to be diagnosed with ADHD. Stagnant statistic and what this tells me, what this helps us to understand, is true.

Speaker 1: 5:09

As we think about our topic today, we have these diagnoses and different mental health struggles. This helps us to think about a very important question how are we learning from the struggles and problems that we go through? Jesus says in the gospels that, except the seed falls into the ground and dies, it can not produce fruit. I want to ask you a question that I asked at the very beginning. What is it we can learn from the experiences that we go through? This is best important because how we posture ourselves to learn from the experiences that we go through will give us the best possible option to manage the negative things that we experience in our lives.

Speaker 1: 6:24

Okay, so I want you to think about whatever you're going through right now that's causing discomfort, pain, that's causing you headaches, frustrations and confusion. I want you to think about that thing right now and I want to ask you what are you learning from that? Well, how? Maybe a better question is, how can we learn from these negative experiences? And what I promise you is that these three things I'm going to recommend to you are what I like to consider life hacks, because we're all going through pain. We're all going through some form of discomfort or change in our lives. With change and discomfort, we have one or two options. John Maxwell says we can either grow back from those experiences or we can learn from those experiences, and what my goal is today, here, on this 29th of October, is to help you to understand, or at least to consider a different way to look at your circumstances.

Speaker 1: 7:23

So the first thing we need to do is that we need to have a positive posture. Is that we need to have a positive posture. Having a positive posture means that we put ourselves in the best possible position to manage negativity in our lives. Okay, and the way we put ourselves in a positive posture is we first check our attitude. We can check our assumptions and expectations, because that's important. Are you a negative versus pessimistic person? Which one are you? How are you looking at the current circumstance that you are experiencing? Are you looking at it from a negative point of view or from a positive point of view? Okay, your money, your relationships, everything that you're going through right now, what is your mental disposition? In other words, are you constantly in a negative state or negative flow of mind because of what you're going through? And so it doesn't. To have a positive posture doesn't suggest that you ignore the reality of your experience. That would be superficial and, quite honestly, you and I could be lying about that. But a better way to think about how you deal with negative experiences is you deciding to have a positive mindset, and deciding to have a positive mindset is simply you saying to yourself I am going to find the good out of the bad that I'm experiencing. I'm going to find the good out of the bad that I'm experiencing. I'm going to find the good out of the bad that I'm experiencing.

Speaker 1: 8:58

I thought about this in my own experiences that I've gone through and grown through, something that happened, unfortunately, to me very recently. Sometimes I get complaints and people complain about me and literally, I think, some people trying to get me in trouble, right Because of what I do and because I I help a lot of people and I come at a lot of the issues that we experience in our world and in media on the news. From a biblical perspective, I give an example. I suggested that, instead of Christians really focusing on the issue of abortion and I know that my listeners are very on this topic you have different perspectives. You're on either side of the political aisle. For some of you, it's a medical issue, for some of you it's a moral issue, for some of you it's a spiritual issue, for some of you it's simply a medical issue, and so my goal is not to take a stance but, more so, to give an alternative perspective, and an alternative perspective is how can we help by participating in taking care or nurturing parents or young women who are having to make these kinds of decisions? Now, that's an alternative viewpoint. Some people don't like it. So I said to myself instead of you complaining about this, is there any truth to what people are saying or how can you adjust this, your position, not to change what you believe, but what can you learn about it? How can you make sure you're more down the middle of the road, that you're not taking sides? Okay, that's turning a negative experience into an opportunity to learn and grow from it.

Speaker 1: 10:47

John McDonald said this every problem introduces a person to him or herself. Every problem introduces a person to him or herself, right? So you can either be stopped in your tracks by the negative experience you're going through or you can learn from the negative experience. Here's the second thing we need to let negativity make us more creative. That's what I've learned. Instead of complaining about the experiences that I've gone through, instead of complaining about people complaining about me right, how could I can become more creative. How can you become more creative? Have you ever had someone to criticize you unfairly? And there's two ways you can respond to that. Number one you can decide to see if there's any truth in that experience, to either let it roll off your back like water off a duck's back, or you can decide to turn that negative experience to gain something that you can learn. For Now you can feel bad about the experience. You can accept the emotion, whether you were rejected, whether you made bad choices, whether you tried something a career or an opportunity that didn't quite work out in your favor. You can either respond creatively or you can respond with creativity.

Speaker 1: 12:13

Dennis Woolley said expecting the world to treat you fairly just because you are a good person is like expecting the bull not to charge you because you are a vegetarian. So, you and I, we cannot expect the world to always be the way we want it to go. We can't always expect the world to answer us on our terms because, truthfully, the world doesn't owe us anything. What we do, however, is we owe it to ourselves to accept the full brunt and the fullness of life, both its goods and bads, and we can become creative because of it. There's one thing about not having much that causes people to become more creative.

Speaker 1: 12:59

I remember years ago when I was in college and I could not afford food and I had to eat ramen noodles. Well, I had to make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Well, I had to go to. Instead of me spending money on a pack of chicken, for instance, I had to go maybe get some Nathan hot dogs and maybe, if not Nathan, I had to go get the cheaper ones and I had to mix those into my noodles, my ramen, and get some vegetables and mix that into my ramen. Hey, basically, I just had to become creative in order to have a decent meal. Ok, it was Friday night, man. What else do you expect from me? So there's something about having to become creative when you, when your metal, is tested.

Speaker 1: 13:42

Success in life comes not from holding a good hand, but paying a play. But playing a poor hand, a poor hand well, success in life comes not from holding a good hand, but in playing a poor hand. Well, when you have a bad experience, john Maxwell said you can either become better or bitter, and so this is what we need to learn about letting our negative experiences prompt creativity. And then here's the third thing I'll share with you before we get out of here, we have to embrace the value of negative experiences. Dr King says where there is no growth, there is no struggle. What happened during the civil rights movement whether you believe it or not, is irrelevant, but the principle and application is the same. In order for people to have voting rights in the United States African-American women is that there was struggle. Women for having voting rights and those who are opposed to 64 Voting Rights Act right, you had to have people on the opposite side who said no, it is my right. No, segregation is wrong, integration is right. The value what negative experiences do. If we embrace negative experiences, we can learn from them.

Speaker 1: 14:55

The pain of disappointment, conflict, change right. Being in the military, I have to move. Often that's pain and conflict. My children grow up. I have to move when me and someone in my, my, one of my children don't get along, or we have an argument, or I made a bad financial decision or a relationship is lost because somebody broke my heart. Or the pain of, you know, having to be away on deployments and all of these things. All of these are examples of different painful experiences I have gone through, and if you've experienced a painful experience, you know what it feels like to not even want to get out of the bed in the morning. Have you ever had that experience? I have, but how do we turn our pain into gain? Experience isn't really the best teacher, but it sure does serve as the best excuse for not trying to do the same silly thing again.

Speaker 1: 15:49

Frank Hughes says OK, so we have to choose to have a positive stance. Right. Life is not the way it's supposed to be. It is what it is. It is what it is, and so what we're saying here is that difficulties can become opportunities. Pain can help us to make changes.

Speaker 1: 16:12

When I had my heart scare back in 2023, I realized that I had to make changes. I didn't expect a heart scare. It caught me off guard. I'm a pretty healthy person for the most part. I work out regularly. I try my best to eat well. But listen, it caught me off guard In that experience, though painful, taught me that I needed to make change.

Speaker 1: 16:38

Charles Killering said this you will never stub your toe standing still. The faster you go, the more chance there is of stubbing your toe, but the more chance you have getting somewhere. Okay, this is the value of negative experiences. So just to recap one positive experiences, having a positive stance, is important as we deal with hardship, letting creativity, let negative experiences spark or prompt creativity, and learning that negative experiences have value because they can help us to make the needed changes that we have OK.

Speaker 1: 17:20

So listen, I I want to encourage you to continue to follow the Words for Change podcast and share this with someone who can benefit from it. You can also go and check us out on YouTube from it. You can also go and check us out on YouTube. Words for Change podcast on YouTube is there for you as well, and I really, if you're on Apple, you can give us a five-star review rating on Apple podcast. We really, really would appreciate that. Okay, and so, as always, I really thank you for your support of the Words for Change podcast and we look forward to seeing you on NoVertMetaphor Peace.